To make this world work, it takes all different kinds
We all have different tastes, different strengths, different minds — Kimya Dawson
At a hostel in Seattle, I signed up for the city tour led by one of the hostel workers. He was balding, and his remaining clutch of occipital hair was dyed bright purple.
“I’m a big fan of not changing your personality, rather, I like finding things that let me use my personality. For example, I was always that annoying guy at the party who would talk your ear off explaining things. Now, explaining is my job!”
He then led us into Seattle’s nooks and crannies, including the cavernous Pike Place market and a street where the walls were covered in chewed bubble gum. He told us the fascinating history of all these places as we walked. At a party, his patter would have been “monopolizing the conversation” but as a tour guide, it was just right.
In medicine, it took me years to realize that multitasking and interruptions are my Achilles heel. My brain easily gets distracted when there are lots of beeps and buzzers going off. This was worst during intern year on my nights rotation, when I had to hold five pagers and play a very organized version of whack-a-mole.
“Ms. X’s potassium is 5.9, Mr. Y has chest pain, Mrs. Z needs a Tylenol refill,” the pagers would inform me in quick succession. I’d have to prioritize these tasks, and dozens of others, throughout the night. While I got better at it, it seemed that many of my co-residents were naturals, able to keep their focus and cool from week one on the job.
Later in my career, I was covering inpatient neurology at two different hospitals, and noticed that when I got home, I was very drained, and had many notes still-to-do. I noticed that I had much more energy when I came home from the clinic. So, I asked my boss if I could focus on outpatient work. In the clinic, there are much fewer interruptions, and I’m able to focus for a long stretch of time on one patient, without my pager pulling me away.
Recently, we adopted two sibling cats. Lady Oolong loves to spend time on her own, often in high places. Rooibos, who we call Roy-Roy, is a lover. He’ll often come up to us, purring loudly, wanting pets. Oolong is very motivated by food: she’ll impatiently push my hand as I feed her, wanting the kibble even faster. Roy-Roy is an explorer: he constantly paws at the door to go outside. It struck me that these differences are natural, in-born differences in their tastes, strengths, and minds. Even though they are siblings, they are so different.
At my bachelor party, it struck my how community allowed people’s natural strengths to shine. One person picked just the right playlist for the moment, while others did the dishes and cooked. One person was very organized about time, which was super-helpful, but it would have been a lot less fun if everyone was so time-oriented. Conversely, if everyone was super spontaneous, we’d have probably missed the wedding!
I recently found myself wondering about which combination of the big five personality traits are “best.” After reflecting for a while, I realize that there is no “best.” In a community, we need all different kinds. We need the super organized person and the super spontaneous person. We need Piglet to spot danger and we need Winnie-The-Pooh’s optimism.
And it strikes me that rather than trying to change myself or other people, it’s best to ask, like that tour guide in Seattle: “How can I best use what I’ve got?”
danscreativeoulet 